Today is not a happy day. Rent is due by tomorrow, as well as a ridiculous bill from the dentist who apparently think it's funny to overcharge a young married couple even though they have dental insurance (thank you, loopholes in the system that no one told me about!!). These two happenings wouldn't be that bad except for one thing-I can't find my checkbook. Also, Houston's under a severe thunderstorm/tornado watch today, and my umbrella is...wait, I don't have one.
Combined, these things wouldn't be allllll that bad, but to top things off, my Longhorns forgot to show up in College Station (but who could blame them?) and they subsequentaly got their butts handed to them in an embarrassing 80-63 loss on natty tv. And for anyone who saw the game...I mean good greif, is their a more annoying group of fans than the Aggies? Talk about insufferable, those folks kill me. This years version of the Runnin Horns has been about as consistent and heart-attack enducing as the 2007 football team. Tons of potential, a few wins that make you go "Wow," but not in the least bit consistent. They started the year with an impressive victory over Tennessee in a preaseason tournament, and followed that up with a last second-victory on the road against UCLA. (By the way, each of those teams have been kicking tail ever since, and will probably be a top two seed in the NCAA's.) UT, meanwhile has been up and down, going 5-4 since their 11-0 start. I understand that they are young and only go about six deep, but after the impressive start, the last month or so has been a bit disheartning. On the bright side, they may have found a little more depth last night, as Dexter Pittman played by far his best game as a Longhorn; unfortunately, Damion James, DJ Augustin, and AJ Abrams played one of their worst. All in all, I guess you've just gotta chalk this one up to a bad game against a good team with a-literally- crazy fan base. The season is not over, the sky is not falling (although it currently looks like it outside down here) the Horns still have a good team with a shot to advance in the Tourney, so last night wasn't a complete waste.
This column may sound life a self-therapy session, and maybe it is a little bit. I haven't brought this up yet, but here at Sartartia, approximately 98% of the teachers here are atm alumns. That's right, the students here are Patriot fans and the teachers are Aggs. Not good times. Bad times. So, even though I'd like nothing more than to forget last night, I'm probably going to hear about it all day. You know how Aggie fans are insufferable on TV? It's ten times worse in person. Seriously, shoot me now. If not, maybe I can just step outside and get blown away by the Armageddon that is currently in the Houston sky.
Gag me Gladdys,
Twig
Thursday, January 31, 2008
Monday, January 28, 2008
Let's stop before we get started....
Lets keep talking about football while we still can. Here is a story I heard last week that I thought was pretty dumb and just forgot about it, but now, 4-5 days later, it seems to be gaining a little weight, and I am getting pretty darn concerned. Here's the story:
Dolphins are willing to trade the Cowboys the Overall #1 pick this year, for both of our first rounders and Marion Barber.
At first, I thought this was so ridiculous that I didn't pay much attention to it, but after watching "Around The Horn", and having 3 out of 4 writers saying this was a good idea, I became very uncomfortable.
Did anyone see what MB3 did in the playoff game against the Giants? I did. I was there actually. You might say, well, what did he do in the second half?
He blocked. That's right. We completely got away from running the ball in the second half, which, I know, we are a passing team, so I'm not mad, but you can't deny, he is bad to the bone.
Did you know that was Marion 1st start of the season. Yeah. He has been sitting behind J.J. all year and was easily the better of the two backs. I guess what I'm trying to say is: Marion Barber III is not just good. I believe he could be one of the premier backs in the league. Give him the ball. Do not trade him. My father-in-law would so affectionally tell me that, "One bird in the hand is worth two in the bush". I cannot see the value in letting go of one of the best backs in the league to try and hit a homerun with Mcfadden. Listen to me. Keep both of the first rounders. Get a starting corner and maybe a reciever. Heck, get two corners. Let's save room in the cap, which we would have to pay to D-Mac, and resign Flozo Adams, or go after another big name OLmen so we can keep dominating on the line of scrimmage. Jerry, please, listen to me. Use the components that we have and try to fix our weaknesses. Let's not send one of our best players that brings a fire to the entire team away in hopes we can get a back that honestly can't be too much better than MB3. All of you out there, let me know how you feel, please tell me I'm not alone. Plus, I'm thinking about taking that Jordan Sparks anthem at over 1:42 during the Super Bowl. Let me know.
-JigB3
Dolphins are willing to trade the Cowboys the Overall #1 pick this year, for both of our first rounders and Marion Barber.
At first, I thought this was so ridiculous that I didn't pay much attention to it, but after watching "Around The Horn", and having 3 out of 4 writers saying this was a good idea, I became very uncomfortable.
Did anyone see what MB3 did in the playoff game against the Giants? I did. I was there actually. You might say, well, what did he do in the second half?
He blocked. That's right. We completely got away from running the ball in the second half, which, I know, we are a passing team, so I'm not mad, but you can't deny, he is bad to the bone.
Did you know that was Marion 1st start of the season. Yeah. He has been sitting behind J.J. all year and was easily the better of the two backs. I guess what I'm trying to say is: Marion Barber III is not just good. I believe he could be one of the premier backs in the league. Give him the ball. Do not trade him. My father-in-law would so affectionally tell me that, "One bird in the hand is worth two in the bush". I cannot see the value in letting go of one of the best backs in the league to try and hit a homerun with Mcfadden. Listen to me. Keep both of the first rounders. Get a starting corner and maybe a reciever. Heck, get two corners. Let's save room in the cap, which we would have to pay to D-Mac, and resign Flozo Adams, or go after another big name OLmen so we can keep dominating on the line of scrimmage. Jerry, please, listen to me. Use the components that we have and try to fix our weaknesses. Let's not send one of our best players that brings a fire to the entire team away in hopes we can get a back that honestly can't be too much better than MB3. All of you out there, let me know how you feel, please tell me I'm not alone. Plus, I'm thinking about taking that Jordan Sparks anthem at over 1:42 during the Super Bowl. Let me know.
-JigB3
I Bet You Won't
Whilst perusing through si.com to pass my lunch break, I came across this link to some of the most ridiculous bets one can make for the Super Bowl this Sunday. It's been well documented on JAT that neither of us could give a hoot about the game, so placing bets on commercials, halftime shows, pre and post-game coverage, and speeches may be the best way to lure both The Jig and Twig to the set this Sunday. Hold on to your butts folks, a lot of money could be lost in six days...
http://vegaswatch.net/2008/01/most-ridiculous-super-bowl-xlii-props.html
-Twig
http://vegaswatch.net/2008/01/most-ridiculous-super-bowl-xlii-props.html
-Twig
Wednesday, January 23, 2008
Double Ball anyone?
In case you don't know, Double Ball is the game we made up during last year's Super Bowl. It was a ton of fun and we seriously missed 73% of the game because we were so wrapped up in it. I actually wanted to watch last year's game. I don't think I could state my feelings about this year's game any better than my boy Twig did, so I've decided to come up with a few things to make this years game a bit more fun. Come up with your own conclusions, keep score, and we will see who wins:
During the Super Bowl I say there will be:
-At least 2 references to Tony Romo's recent breakup with The Lizard (as so affectionally named by Randy Galloway) , Jessica Simpson.
- 2 Diet Pepsi Commercials featuring John Stamos.
-2 Interceptions, 1 Lost Fumble, by Eli Manning, however he has turned into a franchise quarterback.
-1 surgery on Tom Coughlin's face after frost bite claimed his lower lip and right eye lid. He was ugly to begin with.
-2 Orthodontist commercials featuring Michael Strahan.
-1 Horrible half time show by Tom Petty, Rolling Stones, or Randy Newman. Can't we get a lil, Outfield, perphaps, the Police.
-2 on screen cameos for John Madden.
-Archie Manning wearing a shirt that says, "Peyton is my only son".
-Terry Bradshaw yelling at Howie Long in the pregame.
-Jimmy Johnson saying his face didn't look as bad as Tom Coughlin's last week.
Let's be honest. For anyone who is a Boys' fan, this is probably the last matchup you would want to see. Unless your the Honorable Scotty Hot Spot Scott, who thinks his boy, Tom Brady, not only hung the moon, but probably threw it into orbit first, or Luke Reeves who was raised to like whatever team was cool, Lakers, Yankess, and now, would dump his future girlfriend to see 19-0. Perphaps I am again getting carried away with the excitement of the Texas Rangers Spring Training, but that would be stupid and I am not that.
-Jig
During the Super Bowl I say there will be:
-At least 2 references to Tony Romo's recent breakup with The Lizard (as so affectionally named by Randy Galloway) , Jessica Simpson.
- 2 Diet Pepsi Commercials featuring John Stamos.
-2 Interceptions, 1 Lost Fumble, by Eli Manning, however he has turned into a franchise quarterback.
-1 surgery on Tom Coughlin's face after frost bite claimed his lower lip and right eye lid. He was ugly to begin with.
-2 Orthodontist commercials featuring Michael Strahan.
-1 Horrible half time show by Tom Petty, Rolling Stones, or Randy Newman. Can't we get a lil, Outfield, perphaps, the Police.
-2 on screen cameos for John Madden.
-Archie Manning wearing a shirt that says, "Peyton is my only son".
-Terry Bradshaw yelling at Howie Long in the pregame.
-Jimmy Johnson saying his face didn't look as bad as Tom Coughlin's last week.
Let's be honest. For anyone who is a Boys' fan, this is probably the last matchup you would want to see. Unless your the Honorable Scotty Hot Spot Scott, who thinks his boy, Tom Brady, not only hung the moon, but probably threw it into orbit first, or Luke Reeves who was raised to like whatever team was cool, Lakers, Yankess, and now, would dump his future girlfriend to see 19-0. Perphaps I am again getting carried away with the excitement of the Texas Rangers Spring Training, but that would be stupid and I am not that.
-Jig
Tuesday, January 22, 2008
Super Bowl, Anyone? No?
About three minutes after the NY Giants defeated the Packers in OT two days ago, my phone rang. I didn't need to see the caller ID, or even pay attention to the ring tone. It was Jig. If the only thing you can count on in this life are death and taxes, a third thing I can count on it getting a call from Jig within five minutes of the conclusion of a Cowboy game, or in this case, any important NFL game. Needless to say, neither of us were pleased with the results of either conference championship game. We weren't particularly surprised that New England won, but I don't think either of us saw the Giants winning a night game at Lambeau. The conversation then turned to what team we want to win the Super Bowl, which was a pretty good way to kill the conversation. Ya see, if there were two teams I really really really hope wouldn't win the Super Bowl this year, the Patriots and Giants would be right at the tippity top. Well, it's been two days since the conference championship games, so I've had time to think about who I'd be semi-rooting for when the "big game" kicks off after two over-hyped weeks. Here were my reasons for each team, followed by my final overall decision.
Reasons to root for the Patriots:
1) They're gonna win.
2) When they win, It'll shut the 1972 Dolphins up for good.
3) It's been three long, agonizing years for the New England faithful. How much longer must they suffer until they're released from their championship-less prison?
Reasons to root for the Giants:
1) Dallas did beat them twice this year
2) Seeing Eli match his bro in SB wins after everyone wrote him off as a serious NFL quarterback would be delightful, although the subsequent commercials and endorsements would not.
3) Having an NFC team defeat an AFC team would be nice; sorta like when Michigan, from the sorry Big 10 beat Florida, from the mighty SEC. Anything to shut up the 'experts' on TV.
There you have it. Those are really the only reasons I could think of for either team, and yes, I know they are pretty sorry reasons both ways. All that to say, I'm definitely not hopping on the NE bandwagon now. If I did, I'd be just like my students I wrote about last week. So, as much as it pains me to say it, and believe me, it's painful, Go Giants. Ugghh, that felt terrible, excuse me while I take a scalding hot shower to get this filthy feeling off of me. Disgusting.
-Twig
Reasons to root for the Patriots:
1) They're gonna win.
2) When they win, It'll shut the 1972 Dolphins up for good.
3) It's been three long, agonizing years for the New England faithful. How much longer must they suffer until they're released from their championship-less prison?
Reasons to root for the Giants:
1) Dallas did beat them twice this year
2) Seeing Eli match his bro in SB wins after everyone wrote him off as a serious NFL quarterback would be delightful, although the subsequent commercials and endorsements would not.
3) Having an NFC team defeat an AFC team would be nice; sorta like when Michigan, from the sorry Big 10 beat Florida, from the mighty SEC. Anything to shut up the 'experts' on TV.
There you have it. Those are really the only reasons I could think of for either team, and yes, I know they are pretty sorry reasons both ways. All that to say, I'm definitely not hopping on the NE bandwagon now. If I did, I'd be just like my students I wrote about last week. So, as much as it pains me to say it, and believe me, it's painful, Go Giants. Ugghh, that felt terrible, excuse me while I take a scalding hot shower to get this filthy feeling off of me. Disgusting.
-Twig
Thursday, January 17, 2008
Mail Time!!
Folks, today is a great day in JAT history for today we do our first ever Maibag issue!!! Wooo-hooo, we're hittin the big time folks! Actually, it's not really a 'mailbag.' Heck, it's only a response to a comment left from my previous article on annoying Patriots fans. The one and only Brandon "Joisey fo Life" Maenius posted an intriguing question/comment that probably all sports fans (and fantasy sports fans) have pondered at some point in their life. I'll break down the question and give my two cents on each subject. I don't claim to be a know-all and end-all for sports questions, yet I do feel somewhat qualified to give a semi-educated explination for Mr. B-Bong's queiries. Here goes:
B: I propose a series of loyatly questions: Is it possible to be a Mavs fan and a Spurs fan? (We all know where I lie)
Me: To be a true fan for any sport, I find it emparative to have one, and only one, favorite 'for better or worse' team. For me, these teams are the Cowboys, Spurs, Rangers, and Texas Longhorns. No matter who these teams are playing and regardless of the kind of season they are having, I'm rooting for them. Now, this isn't to say you can't like other teams or even cheer for them at times. Two years ago, when the Mavs beat the Spurs and played in the NBA Finals, I was pulling hard for them to beat the Heat, and am still a little bitter about how they got jobbed by the refs. That being said, I was still dissapointed that San Antonio fell to them two rounds earlier, but in the Finals I rooted for the Mavs because I'm a Texan and honestly, I like the Mavericks, and even the Rockets. Don't love them. Like them. Same thing for me and baseball. I love the Rangers, but lets be honest, they're awful. So, from April to September, they're my team, but when October rolls around, you can find me cheering for the Boston Red Sox. If they're not in the playoffs, it's Anyone But The Yankees. All that to say, one sport, one team people!!
B: Is it wrong to root for the Philadelphia Eagles, just because you have Brian Westbrook on your fantasy football team?
Me: Yes and no. If you're a true Cowboy fan, and I know you are Brandon, you never want Philly to win. However, if you have Westbrook, McNabb, or another Eagle on your fantasy team, I don't think it's wrong to root for that individual player to do well. This is really the Catch 22 of fantasy sports, and Bill Simmons wrote a great article about this very thing a year or so back, I'm just too lazy to find it in his archives and provide a link. (I'll leave that to you, Justin Scott) Anyway, if you have a good player from a rival team on your fantasy squad, I don't have a problem with wishing that player well, so long as his team loses.
B: Is it wrong to hate a team, but like one player on that team?
Me: I don't think so. The fantasy issue comes to mind here, because you'd obviously be partial to a player on your fantasy squad even if he plays for a rival team. For me, I like to root for former Longhorns in the NFL, even when they're playing for a team I don't like. For instance, I was happy to know that Aaron Ross played well for the Giants this season and was bummed to see him get hurt against the Cowboys on Sunday. Also, when the 'Boys played at Tennessee last year, I was hoping Vince Young played well, but that ultimately Dallas would win. All in all, I feel fine about liking and even rooting for opposing players, so long as it doesn't interfere with what's most important-rooting for your favorite TEAM.
That'll do it faithful readers. I'd like to thank Brandon for his comment, which gave me an idea of what to write. Hopefully my response was helpful, but again, I don't claim to be an expert, so feel free to form your own opinions, and please respond, I'd love to hear y'alls thoughts.
-Twig
B: I propose a series of loyatly questions: Is it possible to be a Mavs fan and a Spurs fan? (We all know where I lie)
Me: To be a true fan for any sport, I find it emparative to have one, and only one, favorite 'for better or worse' team. For me, these teams are the Cowboys, Spurs, Rangers, and Texas Longhorns. No matter who these teams are playing and regardless of the kind of season they are having, I'm rooting for them. Now, this isn't to say you can't like other teams or even cheer for them at times. Two years ago, when the Mavs beat the Spurs and played in the NBA Finals, I was pulling hard for them to beat the Heat, and am still a little bitter about how they got jobbed by the refs. That being said, I was still dissapointed that San Antonio fell to them two rounds earlier, but in the Finals I rooted for the Mavs because I'm a Texan and honestly, I like the Mavericks, and even the Rockets. Don't love them. Like them. Same thing for me and baseball. I love the Rangers, but lets be honest, they're awful. So, from April to September, they're my team, but when October rolls around, you can find me cheering for the Boston Red Sox. If they're not in the playoffs, it's Anyone But The Yankees. All that to say, one sport, one team people!!
B: Is it wrong to root for the Philadelphia Eagles, just because you have Brian Westbrook on your fantasy football team?
Me: Yes and no. If you're a true Cowboy fan, and I know you are Brandon, you never want Philly to win. However, if you have Westbrook, McNabb, or another Eagle on your fantasy team, I don't think it's wrong to root for that individual player to do well. This is really the Catch 22 of fantasy sports, and Bill Simmons wrote a great article about this very thing a year or so back, I'm just too lazy to find it in his archives and provide a link. (I'll leave that to you, Justin Scott) Anyway, if you have a good player from a rival team on your fantasy squad, I don't have a problem with wishing that player well, so long as his team loses.
B: Is it wrong to hate a team, but like one player on that team?
Me: I don't think so. The fantasy issue comes to mind here, because you'd obviously be partial to a player on your fantasy squad even if he plays for a rival team. For me, I like to root for former Longhorns in the NFL, even when they're playing for a team I don't like. For instance, I was happy to know that Aaron Ross played well for the Giants this season and was bummed to see him get hurt against the Cowboys on Sunday. Also, when the 'Boys played at Tennessee last year, I was hoping Vince Young played well, but that ultimately Dallas would win. All in all, I feel fine about liking and even rooting for opposing players, so long as it doesn't interfere with what's most important-rooting for your favorite TEAM.
That'll do it faithful readers. I'd like to thank Brandon for his comment, which gave me an idea of what to write. Hopefully my response was helpful, but again, I don't claim to be an expert, so feel free to form your own opinions, and please respond, I'd love to hear y'alls thoughts.
-Twig
Tuesday, January 15, 2008
Don't Pull a Hammy Hoppin' Off
Bill Simmons (AKA the Sports Guy, AKA Tom Brady's Jockstrap, AKA Boston Apologist*) a writer for espn.com, has mentioned in the past about how much he despised the Cowboys in the early to mid-90's (You remember, when they were good) because so many people in his native New England jumped on the Cowboy bandwagon and pretended to be true fans, even though he knew that they were just rooting for the most popular and most successful franchise at the time. When I first read about his hatred for the 'Boys, I thought it was a little silly. I mean come on dude, it's just a team, who cares if your friends and neighbors in Bahston wanted to root for a winner? Well I'm here to say, I hate bandwagon fans and I hate, hate, haaaaaaate bandwagon fans of the New England Patriots.
When I moved to Houston last summer, I was warned about being a Cowboys fan down here. I didn't know what to expect; I had grown up in a place that's Cowboy crazy, and went to college in a town that felt the same bout the 'Boys. Well, Houston's a bit different. It really isn't as bad as I expected, there's actually a decent amount of Cowboy fans, so it's not like I'm the only one out of 2 million people who like them, but we're definitely in the minority. Anyway, the most surprising thing isn't that there aren't a ton of Cowboy fans, and it isn't that there are a lot of Texan and even Saints fans. The most surprising thing is that there is a large population, especially here at Sartartia Middle School, of Patriot fans. Now, I understand that a middle school mind makes about as much sense as the BCS, but for the life of me, I can't understand why anyone who's not from the greater New England area would root for a group of such arrogant, classless individuals. Unfortunately, Pats fans of today are like Cowboy fans of ten years ago and like Yankee fans of always: The only thing that matters is your record: local teams, loyalty, and class be darned. What aggrivates me the most is when the Cowboys lose, I get to hear about it at school, while these spineless 'fans' of the Patriots gloat about how awesome they are, and how they're gonna go undefeated, and blah blah blah. It got to the point that one day, during class, I had a 'Come to Jesus' talk with a couple of boys who were bragging about how good the Patriots are and how bad the Cowboys sucked (Even though they were like 10-1 at the time) What I told them was that they weren't real Patriot fans. When they insisted that they were, I proceeded to explain to them why they weren't real Pat fans. When, during your entire sports-watching life, there's only been one dominant team, latching on to them and claiming to be a fan is easy. There's nothing deep about your loyalty and devotion to that team. For the kids I teach, they were about 7-some younger-in Febuary 2002 when the Pats won their first of three Super Bowls. Tell me, student, do you remember the Patriots and their legacy before they beat the Rams in SB XXXVI? No, Mr Agan, give me a break, I was like five. Well student, here's the deal about your 'favorite' team. They were awful. They went to two Super Bowls EVER before then, getting beat in both of them. They were one of the perenial losers of the NFL, and had a smaller fan base than the Houston Dynamo. No one outside of Boston wanted any part of them, and if Drew Bledsoe didn't get hurt early in the 2001 season, Tom Brady doesn't play, and the whole dynasty never gets off the ground.
Needless to say, my teenage audience was pretty shell-shocked. I mean, I really thought I had gotten through to them, but their only response was, "So? The Cowboys still suck." Faaaantastic.
I guess I shouldn't be too surprised in the bandwagon-ability of middle school students. When I was a student teacher in Abilene, it was the spring of 2006-just weeks after the greatest day in college football history. As great of a time as it was to be a Texas Longhorn fan, I did have to question the loyalty of all the 12 and 13 year olds rocking burnt orange shirts, sweatshirts and jerseys (It was almost comical, every day in class it seemed like half the room was wearing some sort of UT garment.) I'm sure a good portion of them were true fans, but really, how many of them suffered through all the letdowns of previous years? How many of them remembered the Big XII championship against Colorado in 2001? How bout 'Route 66' against UCLA in 1997? (I do-I was there) What about all the losses to Oklahoma and many other late season choke-fests, where one or two more wins would place the Horns among college football's elite?
When it comes down to it, true fans are there in the good times and the bad. If these kids who claim to looooove the Patriots are still rooting for them in a few years when Brady retires, Belicheck loses his edge, Randy Moss gets tired of playing hard, and the Pats are another mediocre team in the NFL, then I apologize, I underestimated their loyalty. However, something tells me that when that day comes, they will have moved on to a second or third 'favorite team' because it's easy and fun to root for a consistent winner. So here's to you, Sports Guy, thirteen years after you were in New England, faithfully suffering through the atrocity that was the Patriots and despising the Cowboys and their bandwagon fans, the tides have turned. For today, here in Texas, a young man who knew of nothing other than Dallas Cowboy Super Bowls as a youngster, seeths at the sight of the Patriots and their young, uninformed, and probably unfaithful, 'fans.'
-Twig
*Editors note: Twig is actually a big fan of Simmons. He reads all of the Sports Guy columns, owns his book, and as soon as the second one hits the shelves, Twig will be first in line to snag a copy. He's just a bit preturbd at the way Simmons defends the Pats and wanted to throw a little jab at the BSG. Also, Twig feels like a complete tool refering to himself in the third person, and promises never to do it again.
When I moved to Houston last summer, I was warned about being a Cowboys fan down here. I didn't know what to expect; I had grown up in a place that's Cowboy crazy, and went to college in a town that felt the same bout the 'Boys. Well, Houston's a bit different. It really isn't as bad as I expected, there's actually a decent amount of Cowboy fans, so it's not like I'm the only one out of 2 million people who like them, but we're definitely in the minority. Anyway, the most surprising thing isn't that there aren't a ton of Cowboy fans, and it isn't that there are a lot of Texan and even Saints fans. The most surprising thing is that there is a large population, especially here at Sartartia Middle School, of Patriot fans. Now, I understand that a middle school mind makes about as much sense as the BCS, but for the life of me, I can't understand why anyone who's not from the greater New England area would root for a group of such arrogant, classless individuals. Unfortunately, Pats fans of today are like Cowboy fans of ten years ago and like Yankee fans of always: The only thing that matters is your record: local teams, loyalty, and class be darned. What aggrivates me the most is when the Cowboys lose, I get to hear about it at school, while these spineless 'fans' of the Patriots gloat about how awesome they are, and how they're gonna go undefeated, and blah blah blah. It got to the point that one day, during class, I had a 'Come to Jesus' talk with a couple of boys who were bragging about how good the Patriots are and how bad the Cowboys sucked (Even though they were like 10-1 at the time) What I told them was that they weren't real Patriot fans. When they insisted that they were, I proceeded to explain to them why they weren't real Pat fans. When, during your entire sports-watching life, there's only been one dominant team, latching on to them and claiming to be a fan is easy. There's nothing deep about your loyalty and devotion to that team. For the kids I teach, they were about 7-some younger-in Febuary 2002 when the Pats won their first of three Super Bowls. Tell me, student, do you remember the Patriots and their legacy before they beat the Rams in SB XXXVI? No, Mr Agan, give me a break, I was like five. Well student, here's the deal about your 'favorite' team. They were awful. They went to two Super Bowls EVER before then, getting beat in both of them. They were one of the perenial losers of the NFL, and had a smaller fan base than the Houston Dynamo. No one outside of Boston wanted any part of them, and if Drew Bledsoe didn't get hurt early in the 2001 season, Tom Brady doesn't play, and the whole dynasty never gets off the ground.
Needless to say, my teenage audience was pretty shell-shocked. I mean, I really thought I had gotten through to them, but their only response was, "So? The Cowboys still suck." Faaaantastic.
I guess I shouldn't be too surprised in the bandwagon-ability of middle school students. When I was a student teacher in Abilene, it was the spring of 2006-just weeks after the greatest day in college football history. As great of a time as it was to be a Texas Longhorn fan, I did have to question the loyalty of all the 12 and 13 year olds rocking burnt orange shirts, sweatshirts and jerseys (It was almost comical, every day in class it seemed like half the room was wearing some sort of UT garment.) I'm sure a good portion of them were true fans, but really, how many of them suffered through all the letdowns of previous years? How many of them remembered the Big XII championship against Colorado in 2001? How bout 'Route 66' against UCLA in 1997? (I do-I was there) What about all the losses to Oklahoma and many other late season choke-fests, where one or two more wins would place the Horns among college football's elite?
When it comes down to it, true fans are there in the good times and the bad. If these kids who claim to looooove the Patriots are still rooting for them in a few years when Brady retires, Belicheck loses his edge, Randy Moss gets tired of playing hard, and the Pats are another mediocre team in the NFL, then I apologize, I underestimated their loyalty. However, something tells me that when that day comes, they will have moved on to a second or third 'favorite team' because it's easy and fun to root for a consistent winner. So here's to you, Sports Guy, thirteen years after you were in New England, faithfully suffering through the atrocity that was the Patriots and despising the Cowboys and their bandwagon fans, the tides have turned. For today, here in Texas, a young man who knew of nothing other than Dallas Cowboy Super Bowls as a youngster, seeths at the sight of the Patriots and their young, uninformed, and probably unfaithful, 'fans.'
-Twig
*Editors note: Twig is actually a big fan of Simmons. He reads all of the Sports Guy columns, owns his book, and as soon as the second one hits the shelves, Twig will be first in line to snag a copy. He's just a bit preturbd at the way Simmons defends the Pats and wanted to throw a little jab at the BSG. Also, Twig feels like a complete tool refering to himself in the third person, and promises never to do it again.
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