It's Easy And Cool To Brush Before School

These aren't sports related, but I had to pass along two items of interest:

The Touch And Brush

The Peekaru, a Snuggie for infants.

Question is, readers, which is more absurd?

Also, while we're on the topic of annoying infomercials, the ShamWow guy got arrested for, wait for it...hitting a prostitute. Ughhh.

Attoning For Past Mistakes

This picture has nothing to do with the column, but any time you can put up the original TCB team, you've got to do it.

One of my new found ways to kill time/delay doing school work is reading old posts on this and other blogs. (For a comprehensive list of said blogs, scroll to the post a few days ago. Yep, still no password)

It is fun to read thoughts, observations, and comments from the past and see how they turned out in real life. For the heck of it, here are some interesting points I came across, as well as some corrections for totally wrong predictions.

From a post about the Cowboys signing Pacman: I endorsed Adam coming to Dallas. I thought that was a good idea at the time, and would work well for the Boys. I was wrong.

From a post talking about the upcoming 2008 NCAA football season. I did not include Colt McCoy as one of the top QB's in the nation. Granted, he was coming off a very mediocre 2007, and there were even some UT fans calling for John Chiles to start, but looking back, that was one of my (thankfully) worst misses ever. And that includes the baby-blue thrift store suit I wore to freshman formal at ACU.

Not interviewing someone from the Real World when that mysterious commenter said I could if i wanted to last spring. Weird sequence of events, but I should have been more proactive.

In a post about UT's basketball uniforms, I mentioned how many teams had gone to Nike's System of Dress. One year later, and even more teams have gone the Dress route. Even Davidson started wearing it in the NIT this year, along with Gonzaga in the NCAA's. Just terrible, someone has to stop Nike.

Saying that Texas would 'probably' miss Jamaal Charles in 2008. Um, yuh think so, Doctor? Yes, they had a great '08, better than anyone, myself included, expected, but how good would they have been if JC was in the lineup? Their biggest offensive woe was not having a reliable running game and, as Shirley Q Liquor would say, "I shudders to think" how potent the offense would have been had Jamaal come back.

At various points, I talked about being a Tech fan. I don't know what it is, but since we've been here, I like them less and less. Before coming to Lubbock, I could stand the Raiders to a degree, as long as they weren't playing Texas, but now, I really can't bring myself to root for them. Of course, this may have something to do with it.*

It was sad to read in post how excited I was about the Cowboys upcoming season. At some point, I claimed that, unless they AT LEAST reached the Super Bowl, it would be a disappointing season. Umm. The way things turned out, it wasn't that bad when they missed the playoffs, because you could see it coming since November, but still. To have such high expectations and fall so short of them is...well, it's being a Dallas Cowboy fan.

Back when Jig posted, he predicted a six loss season for the New England Patriots. They lost five times, but it was still a great prediction.

At one point, I talked about enjoying golf. I have since not done much enjoying, but the Masters is right around the corner, so maybe I'll get back into it. At least for one weekend.

In one of my first posts about Lost, I called Juliette a harlot, and talked about how I didn't like her. Juliette, I'm sorry. You're not a harlot. In fact, I like you a lot. She has her heart in the right place (I think) and the Juliette/Sawyer pair is significantly better than Team Kate/Jack.

I can't think of anything else right now. As the days and months go along, I'll definitely made observations and predictions that will turn out to be completely off-base, and when that day comes, please dear reader, call me out. Until then, so long.

*Watching that video made my stomach hurt. Granted, that could have been the two cups of coffee I drank, but I digress. The clip didn't show UT scoring with 20 seconds left on the play clock (mistake #1)**, but it did show their terrible kick coverage after the kickoff went into the end zone (mistake #2), then the rest of the drive, in which UT allowed Tech to do pretty much anything they wanted, including running the game-winning play a first time, around midfield, with the defensive back not looking at Harrell the entire play. Sound familiar? Then, of course, was the non-interception, that I still think will be caught every time I watch a replay. What makes it even worse that it already is, on this video, is the Tech radio guys talking about how the pass was picked and the game is over, only to realize their team still has life after watching the replay.

**Actually, mistake #1 was the running play that resulted in the safety in the first quarter. Mistake #2 was Shipley dropping a wide-open bomb that would probably have resulted in a momentum-changing TD for the Horns. Those two plays set the tone, and all in all, there were about 20 different things that, if just one or maybe two go UT's way, they win. Someday, I'm going to get over this, I promise.

I've Got A Little Bit Of Time For Killing With Me

1987. The gift that keeps on giving.

The staff of JAT would like to extend Happy Birthday wishes to Reid Andrew Agan, Twig's younger brother. He's spending his 22nd in the Big Easy. It's not as crazy (I hope) as it sounds, he's allegedly in town for a marketing convention or something like that. Apparently he saw a presentation by someone within the Miami Heat organization, and was pretty impressed.

Needless to say, if he gets a job with an NBA team before I do, words can't describe the level of pissed I'll be. Not that I wouldn't be proud of him or anything, just remember, he's the guy who read Animorphs for three hours straight in the fall of 1997 when we had front-row seats to a Spurs-Rockets tilt in SA. That game was awesome. The Spurs won, and Chuck Barkley got ejected for punting the ball into the stands. Also, the Rockets were staying at our hotel, so I got to pat Clyde Drexler on the shoulder and tell him good luck (even though I rooted for the other team. HAAHAHAHAHAH) as he left for the game. That makes Drexler the second most famous person's shoulder I've patted.

The winner of that category would be Peyton Manning. The setting: A few months later, in December, at War Memorial Stadium in Little Rock, Arkansas. Uncle Jim got us tickets to the Arkansas-Tennessee game, and our tickets were right by the visiting locker rooms. At the time, I thought I just touched a future Heisman Trophy winner, but alas, it was not to be. Anyway, all that to say Happy Birthday, Brother.

Where'd You Go, I Miss You So

'Their monuments were not pyramids, which is why they were so hard to find; they were horizontal features. But they're no less extraordinary.'

'In a cave...Roosevelt made another astonishing discovery: seventy-five-hundred-year-old pottery, which predates by more than two thousand years the earliest pottery found in the Andes or Mesoamerica. This means that...as Fawcett radically argued, the region was possibly even a wellspring of civilization throughout South America-that an advanced culture had spread outward, rather than vice-versa.'

In the words of Bill Simmons, "I thought that was interesting."

Z is a fascinating book that spreads light on the golden era of South American exploration. It was a little tough to get through at times, but it brought to light-for me, anyways-the fascination with a continent that had unexplored areas the size of the continental US as recently as the 1920's, as well as the obsession with discovering what happened to the heroic explorer, Percy Harrison "Don't call me Girod" Fawcett. I'll leave it at that and let the book explain the rest of the mystery and attraction that so many had with the Amazon and Fawcett.

Now that I'm finished with Z, I'm getting into the season and have just started Seth Davis' When March Went Mad. So far so good.

A few days ago, the staff over at Running Down a Dream put together a list of all the blogs he keeps up with. Cool idea, Scott, but it's not like you don't have every one's blogs and websites already linked on the side of the blog. I'm not sayin, I'm just sayin.

Regardless, I do think it's a good idea, especially for a blog such as this. Some of you may remember the mythical creature, Jig, who co-founded JAT with me in December of 2007. While it was fun at the time, Jig lost interest and hasn't gotten around to give me his password or make me a blog administrator, so that I can update the site, and make it a little less bland and more reader-friendly. In an email to friends, I vowed not to bother him about the password thingy for the rest of Lent, so I'm not saying anything to him until Good Friday. Or Easter. When does Lent end? I'm afraid I skipped 'Catholic Holidays 101' too much at ACU.

All that to say, I'm gonna link to the blogs and websites I make sure to hit up as often as possible, so hold on to your seats. If your a fledgling blog like this one, expect a jump in page views by 3. It may be time to purchase more bandwidth.

Justin Scott

Joey Halbert

Luke Reeves

Dan Carlson

Kayla Agan

ESPN

Bill Simmons

Deadspin

Burnt Orange Nation

SI

That's it folks. In a few weeks, I may be able to finagle a way to get these links up permanently, but honestly, don't hold your breath.

And yes, that was a Dido reference in the title.

Maddening March

Thoughts and observations while watching my bracket go down the toilet this weekend:

I saw JD McCoy's dad on another TV show the other night. I forgot what the show was, but he was a normal character. By normal, I mean being a guy who keeps himself from berating and controlling every move in his son's life, undermining a state-championship winning football coach, not working, and generally being a pompous you-know-what. Even still, the second I saw him, I had a bad feeling. Now I know how JScott feels every time he sees Joaquin Phoenix after his role in Gladiator. While I thought Scott was talking crazy at the time, given Phoenix's recent behavior, he seems somewhat prophetic.

Like anyone with a pulse who isn't a Buckeye, I loved the ending of the Ohio State/Siena game. However, how does Bill Raftery get away with saying things like "A double order of onions! Garden variety!" after Ronald Moore drilled two three-pointers to win the game?? Is it because he's old so we assume he doesn't know better, or it's March Madness, so everyone is excused to go a little 'out of bounds' with commentary? Again, loved the game, loved the call, but how is the FCC not breaking onions trying to get suspensions or apologies from Raftery and/or CBS?

Speaking of crazy announcers, how crazy would it be if Raftery and Gus Johnson called the Siena/OSU or Gonzaga/WKU game together? Yowzah, I truly think TV sets would explode.

As I type, the Okie State Cowboys just lost to one of my Final Four picks, Pittsburgh. This officially ends any ties I have with college athletes I played against. The first game of my senior year, we played (and beat) Round Rock McNeil, featuring a sharp-shooting freshman, AJ Abrams. The last game of that same year, we lost in the regional quarters to Beaumont Ozen, featuring future NBA champion Kendrick Perkins and a freshman point guard, Byron Eaton. I've made reference before to feeling old, so I won't drown everyone in self-pity, but I guess this is another step into the adult world and away from "Hey, I know that guy! Played against him back in Oh-Two."

That'll do it for now, keep watching FNL and March Madness.

Pick 'Em

In yesterday's BS Report, JAT favorite Bill Simmons and "My Buddy House" discussed, among other things, what college they would hypothetically attend from each of the BCS conferences, if they were once again 18 with the world at their fingertips. Simmons has hinted in the past that, if he ever leaves Los Angeles, Austin, TX would be on his short list of possible destinations, so it wasn't completely surprising when he chose UT as his Big XII University of Choice. Nevertheless, it cemented The Sports Guy as my favorite sports writer of the new century (I used to not read, so no one gets a vote for the 20th century).
Anyway, it got me thinking: If I could go back in time, and could chose one school to 'attend' from each BCS conference, what would they be? Glad you asked. Since I'm sure you're dying to know what I would do in a completely hypothetical world, here are my choices, minus the Big XII, because if you don't know the answer to that by now, you'll never know. And yes, I realize that I currently attend a(nother) Big XII school. Get over it.

ACC: North Carolina. Florida State's intriguing, but getting the chance to see 10-15 games a year at the Dean Dome and boo the Dookies annually is too great an opportunity to pass up.

Big Ten: Wisconsin. I've never been to the state of 'Sconsin, but it seems like a pretty decent place to live. Plus, the Jump Around tradition before the fourth quarter of games at Camp Randall is, quite simply, awesome. Also, every year at homecoming, I would have the chance to find Ron Dayne and punch him in the nose for passing Ricky Williams' rushing record.

Pac-10: Arizona. The first non-Cowboys Sports Illustrated my dad bought me was in 1994, with the Cats' Desert Swarm Defense on the cover. It was the college football preview issue, and had a picture of a young Teddi Bruschi driving a moped around campus in it. Not a bad way to get from class to class. Honorable mention to Oregon, AzState, UCLA, UDub and USC.

Big East: Hmm. Great basketball conference, but most of the schools are waaaayyy up north, where'd I'd probably be miserable. USF? Maybe, but they began using Texas' Hook em sign (they're the Bulls) and that rubs me the wrong way a little. I think I'm going with Louisville on this one. Not crazy about the pick, but they're a good basketball school and can be great at football in that conference. And it's in the South.

SEC: I can only pick one? Really, this is the most difficult one for me, with the Pac-10 running a close second. Florida, Alabama, Tennessee, Georgia, LSU, and Kentucky are all intriguing, but as a student, I have always been drawn to Ole Miss. After reading Rammer Jammer Yellowhammer, and learning about the Grove and the atmosphere of the school, I doubt there's a cooler place to spend years 18-22 of your life than Oxford, Miss. Except Abilene, TX, of course.

Bangarang, Peter

Update from last post: For the betterment of everyone's eyes, it looks like the Rangers have scrapped their two-toned batting helmets for good.

Spring Break started yesterday, so after getting home from a weekend of fun and fellowship in the Metroplex, it's back to sittin around in Lubbock waiting for something (other than school) to do. While I wait, a few thoughts from FNL:

I despise JD McCoy's dad so much, I actually had a dream about him. He shot me in the leg with a poison dart. For real.

I think I finally figured out why it seems like Riggins and Tyra have been in high school for so long: They're following the little-known 'six year' rule, which states, among other things, that if you miss obscene amounts of school for little things like trips to Mexico or New York with a pal, or if you follow an abusive cowboy around the state to watch him gamble his earnings away, it's cool. Just hang around as long as it takes to obtain the required credits, and the fine folks at Dillion High will get you graduated. Because really, it's not like they would be going anywhere anyway.

Who else was disappointed that one of the interviewer's questions to Scholar Athlete Landry Clarke wasn't, "So, you murdered a guy last year, dumped him in a river and got off scot-free. How'd you pull that one off?"

I wish I could have seen the transporter that Saracen's mom and grandmother used to get to the stadium. Honestly, was it just me, or did they see Matt enter the game, get excited, decide to go, and show up before the ball was snapped? Sure, it could have been another play by the time they got there, but the announcer was still talking about how crazy it was that Saracen was in at receiver. Maybe they just live right across the street from the stadium. Of course, that would make Matt needing a ride to school pointless, but that has happened at various points in the series.

As great as this episode was, it was the first one in at least a month that didn't make Kayla cry at one point or another. Unfortunately, the same cannot be said of the Titan at Six Flags over Texas.




Current Reading:

Finally, a bit of good news out of the Texas Rangers organization:

Rangers unveil new alternate home and road jerseys

I hated them going back to the blue unis a few years back, and while I've grown to sorta like them, I'm very pleased that we'll be re-introduced to the red jersey and hat combo, at least on an aleternate basis.

I'm A Loser, Baby

Special thanks to the 'So what have you done with your life lately?' department at si.com for this inspiring video:



My personal favorite is the bartender trick at 1:20. Also, I'm gonna go ahead and say that the cheerleader trick at 2:10 is a fake. It's not that it isn't cool, I just don't want to know what happened the first 568 times they tried before succeeding.

This Is A Free-Flowing Conversation

A few random thoughts before I finally go to bed (Thank you four hour take home test!):

• TO's gone. I've wanted this day to happen since the Philly debacle, but now that it's here I'm kinda sad.

• Lost is kicking butt and taking names. Lovin it. However, what was the deal with Sawyer's beard in "LeFleur?" One scene it's a short, three-days growth scruff, the next its a horrendous shag with equally horrendous Just For Men coloring. Bad bad oversight by the producers. Did they shoot every other scene six months apart? Did they go back and fill in parts after originally wrapping concluded? I don't get it. It's almost as weird as how Hurley's hair was puffy and fro-like the first two season, but recently is a greasy, Michael Jackson circa 1988-like jheri curl. If you think I'm making these accusations up, head over to abc.com and check out the episode(s) in question.

• I didn't watch last week's FNL until tonight, right before Lost. Once again, phenomenal episode. What really tripped me out, though, was seeing Herc in a DHARMA hatch ten seconds after seeing him get in a wheelchair fight with Street on Buddy Garrity's old patio. It took me a while to wrap my mind around what was happening there for a minute.

• As much as I don't care about Texas Tech basketball (promise, I don't. For real) I really would have liked to be at the USA tonight for the butt-whipping of the Jayhawks. Again, thank you, take home test.

• Speaking of things I don't like, I got to watch Oklahoma beat Tech last Saturday. While the game wasn't much to see, I did get to help sneak the Griffin brothers out of the arena, so they could avoid the respectable-size mob of Sooner fans gathering outside their locker room. Don't think I won't be talking people's ears off ten years from now about the 'conversation' I had with young Blake. Ed's note: Actual conversation...BG: "Are there a lot of people out there?" Twig, guarding door: "Yeah dude, there's a lot of them." HE'S TWO YEARS YOUNGER THAN MY BROTHER!!!!!

• I watched HBO's "The Battle For Tobacco Road," a documentary about the Duke/UNC rivalry last week. Unbelievable. Highest of high recommendations for any college basketball fan.

It's March. Let the Madness begin.